So I got up this morning, hopped in and out of the shower, dried off, got dressed, put on some makeup, dried my hair and took the dog out. Came back in, gave Cass her treat (She has come to expect a treat for going outside and coming back in. It's a great trick -- you should see it.), opened the cupboard, got down a glass for milk, went to the fridge, got out egg whites and feta cheese (The Boyfriend and I have decided to try the Caveman Diet -- or at least our own modified version of it. Ours includes wine as we believe cavemen would have eaten rotten grapes, got a little buzz and figured out the whole fermenting thing), found the omelet pan, turned the burner on, poured the egg whites in and crumbled on the cheese.
I then turned to grab my glass and SMASHED my friggin' forehead into the corner of the friggin' open cupboard door. I could feel the bump erupting instantly. I went to the bathroom mirror and sure enough -- not only was there a huge bump on my forehead, but there was a big dent in the middle of it. Very becoming.
I made it to work with just a few minor annoyances (overflowing bus, bad drivers -- the normal things). I stopped for my morning coffee, showed my bump to the baristas and laughed at my folly. Got to the office and chatted with a few colleagues.
I just came back from the washroom and here's what I saw. My bump has a big splotch of dried blood on it, my left eye is noticeably twitching (it has been for four days now) and I forgot to apply mascara!!! OMG! I left the house without mascara? I can live with a bleeding gash on my forehead, even the eye twitch, (both of which make me look a bit insane) but no mascara? That's just scary.
I have three options. Option 1 is donning sunglasses and rushing over to the drugstore to buy a new mascara (though I just opened a new one on the weekend). Option 2 is donning sunglasses, closing my office door and hoping no one knocks. I'm leaning towards option 3 which is blaming it on the Caveman Diet, as side effects may include being bonked on the head, twitchy eyes and a general lack of personal grooming. (Seriously -- notice the twitch in her right eye!)
5 comments:
gah! you poor thing!
my right eye has been twitching on and off for about two weeks. IT IS MADDENING. absolutley driving me MAD.
I met a friend for coffee today and my eye twitch was actually distracting her. What is up with this?
My left eye is in a constant state of twitch. I hear that the main cause is stress and lack of sleep.....I can deal with it, but forgetting mascara - I'm afraid not! I sure you still looked fab though Miss Lianne. You go girl!!
Your photos for this post are hilarious. I had a day like that yesterday, too...aargh. I felt it necessary to hold back the expletives because my daughter was around.
Hope today was better. Thanks for visiting recently.
Really...you knit a microwave cover? I'm impressed!
I love your take on caveman and wine :)
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